Thursday, June 20, 2013

My Deerest; another tale of evolution

Once upon a time there was this little deer, eating a freshly-tossed salad by the shores of the sea.

Suddenly, the deer snaps his head seaward, a couple of leaves hanging from his mouth.  Fish are frolicking just off the shore; little silvery fish leaping up and down, making little splashes in the calm water.

The leaves fall out of the deer's mouth as his tongue licks his lips.  He wants those fish.  He wants to eat those fish.  He looked left; there was a lemon tree.  He looked right; there was a pepper shrub.

"Mmmm mmmm!" he thought to himself, as he ran towards the water and jumped in.

He swam hard towards the fish, his spindly-legs propelling him at barely one knot of speed.  A big grin showed on his face.  "Why, I could just spear them with my antlers...boy, would that be a hoot!"

The fish were getting closer.  More and more were jumping out of the water.  The deer's grin got wider, exposing a gleaming, well polished set of lowers.  Bits and pieces of the salad between those teeth were washed away.

"Fins!" he cried to himself.  "That's what I need!  Why, if I can just get a hold of some fins, I could really catch up to those fish.  And maybe some new teeth, all up and down.  And perhaps a net inside a very big mouth...maybe it could filter out large basketfuls of fishies!"

"I need them NOW!"

He sat still in the water, contemplating what he just said.  A change in diet, change in habit, change in look, all needed now if he was ever to catch any fish at all.  "It looks like it's going to take some time," he thought to himself.  "Maybe a long time.  Maybe generations."

"But it starts with me.  I am the first, I saw a need to go fishing, and one day I'm going to look like a fish myself."

"By the way, why were those fish jumping?"

The deer looked down and saw a great big shark rising up at him.

----

Hours later, several other deer gathered on the beach.  "I wonder what he was doing out there?"

"I dunno.  There's a trail of leaves going to the water...maybe he was washing his food the way the raccoons do in the forest."

"Ah, who cares," said one other.  "Maybe we should evolve a way to cross the $^#@ highway without getting hit by a car!"

Monday, June 3, 2013

The hatred of the First Amendment



In Conservapedia we get all kinds of people who are, sad to say, just plain nuts.  They believe themselves to be superior to others; they know more than we do, we should listen to them, we shouldn't talk unless we get a license to do so, pay a tax or other fee, and apply to the Church of Obama for special dispensation, ad nauseum

The First Amendment to the United States Constitution states:

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or of the right of the people to peaceably assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances."

In short, Conservapedia was set up in part so that we do have a right to practice our religion; we do have a right to freely speak our minds; we do have a right to assemble as a group; and since part of Conservapedia concerns the acts of reporting and criticism, we have a right to a free press.

With that in mind, consider the next statement, posted by a former user who called himself Patmac today:

"Conservative [a user/adminstrator within the site] still goes on with his hatred, I will get blocked for this but here is my promise, I will wait 3 days and if after that time this users hatred is not completely removed from this site I am going to report Conservapedia to the Southern Poverty Law Center and request it is designated a hate group."

The individual Patmac who posted that decided on his own that certain individuals in Conservapedia have no rights to the First Amendment; these individual's postings were to be controlled or else the SPLC would get a phone call.  "By gum, we're gonna shut yer yap!" he thought to himself.  And this reasoning has a basis in what?  Our criticisms of evolution and atheism.  Some people do not want us to say just what is wrong with those two subjects.

It gets a little juicier.  Patmac comes from the island of Great Britain.  By and large there is nothing wrong with the British people; but every hen house in the world contains a few bad eggs, one of which inspired this document.  What I'm saying about this individual is that in his country violent crime is up; the people have no way to defend themselves because liberal versions of British folk decided to confiscate any and all firearms; there is an alien religion (Islam) which has entrenched itself within the country, which British liberals are ignoring, culminating in the recent murder of a soldier who fought in Afghanistan for his country, and the arrest of a woman who flew the Union Jack in a public space - her free speech moment - because a Muslim was upset about it. 

Britain is going down the tubes because of liberalism, and this little individual Patmac wants to come across the pond to correct us?

Good luck with that!